One year and a half later...

Hey...

So here I am, one year and a half later, as the lot of you who still read this blog after so many ups and downs I quit.

What happened?

I still went to the gym, but I ended up quitting, because of the mney and honestly? Because all my motivation was gone, I saw it more as an obligation than a means to an end, it wasn't worth it to me, and I spiralled down when I saw absolutely no results.

I still tried in the summers, to work out from home, but to no avail, I quit time and time again which made me feel hopeless.

The gym I was in closed down some months later too, leaving me with fewer options close to home.

But then again not all is bad news.

Two weeks ago I joined a gym near my school, it's a very small one and  it's excluse to women. That gym is what led me to come back, what led me to write this message.

I pondered on reopening the blog when I first joined, but that idea didn't sit right within me, because despite this blog being what kept me going for so long, it also made me hate being in the gym.

I felt guilt when I dodn't go, and thus couldn't write about it, and in the end turned the whole thing into an obligation and I started to loathe stepping in the gym. Of course this wasn't the sole reason, but it was certainly there to help.

Let me tell you about this new gym, the reason for this whole post.

For the first time I bonded, I feel like I found a family in which I belong to, I look forward to go there every day and work out, no obligation, no guilt, just pure and honest happiness.

I'm not going to lie, it's hard sometimes, but what isn't?

I thought these were the only reasons for me liking this, but there is so much more! Today I tried a private class of TRX and within 10 minutes I almost passed out. My instructor told me it ws normal, and everyone thad their rhythm, as I was used to... I felt horrible, like I was weak and powerless, and I couldn't do as well as other people, I felt inferior, which happens regularly on group classes, I'm so used to I think of that as "normal", and I don't try to push further on my limits, because I settle. But this time she sat beside and asked me a lot of questions, simple questions like my food habits and if I had any health conditions, she CARED, she told me what I had to do to be able to improve myself, and she said all this in a really sweet and motherly tone that almost brought me to tears.

I'm not going to say that nobody ever cared about me, that would be an excuse and an offense to everyone around me, but in that moment I really felt like I WAS like everyone else, that I too could improve myself. It wasn't only her, all the instructors there are super nice and treat us like friends, and the other people at the gym love helping too, we are all a big family, nobody sees us as flawed there, nobody gives you a side look of judgement as you pass by, and to me that is the greatest gym in the world, even if some resources are lacking, that couldn't matter the slighest.

So yes that is my story!

I won't make empty promisses like "i'm going to post again everyday" or something like that, honestly? I haven't figred it out yet, if that is what I want, one thing I'm sure, I'm doing things differently this time, I'm not going to let a blog turn something I truly love into an obligation, never again.

So until we see each other again, if ever, see ya!

Nana

#Day 25 to 30

Hey minna!!!

So I've been exhausted with practice and school and well I'm back at the gym since yesterday!!!

I'm not even gonna bother in doing all the logs, I don't even remember half of it to be honest... But I do have some words to say, I really didn't expected to be able to complete this challenge, but I did, and it feels so amazing! It's like this HUGE sense of accomplishment, like I actually did something  never thought I would do and with my own willpower, I worked to get something and I actually got it, I feel great! (ant tired honestly school+gym is exhausting)

Well I'll leave it at that for now, see yah later!

Nana

#Day 23, 24 and 25

Hey minna!

So I haven't stoped in days! I've been walking a lot which is a good complement to my exercise, but doesn't leave me much time to my actual scheduled exercise... :\

Well here are the logs for the last few days!

Day 23:

- Popcorn.

Day 24:

- Two cereal bars;
- Two icecreams (my friend that monitores me allowed it uwu).

Day 25:

- Two cereal bars;
- Some chocolate almonds.

Well this is all for now see yah later!

Nana

#Day 22

Hey minna!

So yesterday I exercised REALLY late and just did the usual, nothing more to tell, it was a really crappy day in more than one way, so I'll just pass on to the food log:

- Two cheese&ham toasts;
- Two home made hot-dogs;
- One and a half pork sandwish.

Yeah not healthy at all, but there wasn't many alternatives here at home... I really need to make up for it these last vacation days!

Well see yah later!

Nana

#Day 20 and 21

Hey minna!

So Monday was a very special day, I broke my sit-ups record and did 300 of them! Yeah that's a lot, at least for me, of course I took breaks and all but I really feel accomplished!

Well there is nothing much to say besides this, so let's pass on to the food logs.

Day 20:

- One pork sandwish, like with a grilled steak and a little mustard... That's a thing here in Portugal...

Day 21:

- Four toasts;
- Two slices of chocolate cake.

Well this is all for now, see yah later!

Nana

#Day 17, 18 and 19

Hey minna!

Sorry for the sudden disappearence, but I've been pretty occupied with reccording, and my dad's birthday and a dinner party at a pizzaria, my schedule has been full!

Well I almost don't have to say that the exercise I did these days was very very little, although I'll try and compensate it all this week, working as hard as I can!

Here are the food logs...

Day 17:

- Pizza;
- Two slices of ice cream cake;
- Ham&cheese toast.

Day 18:

- One slice of carrot birthday cake;

Day 19:

- Pizza (at the restaurant, including chocolate pizza which is delicious!);

Well this is all for now, see you later!

Nana

Multicultural Songs!

Hey minna!

So lately I noticed that I've been listening to a lot of songs from different countries, like japanese (but that's normal already xD), english (ofc -.-), spanish, italian, korean, german and french! Yeah really strange, anyway I decided to share some of these songs with you so that you can also expand your musical culture and stuff...

Japanese:

This song for a change is not Vocaloid (although there is a vocaloid cover) nor from an anime, just purely japanese, it has japanese instruments also and they go very well with the guitar and drums, enjoy really!

English:

Well most of the songs I listen to are english, I'm going to share the ones I've been listening more often...

(from the trailer for the tv show "Ressurection", at least in Portugal)

(from the sound track of Teen Wolf)

Spanish:

(I have to thank my Spanish teacher to remember me I love this song xD)

Italian:

The loves of my childhood first...

And now the songs I've discovered recently (also old).

(and many by him)

Korean:

(For them I have to give credits to my friend Sakura, she taught me everything I know about korean songs!)

German:

(Yes I know what the songs mean, but my parents don't xD)

French:

Well this is all for now, I REALLY hope you like the musics, and that you'll be able to expand your horizonts!

See yah later!

Nana